Caliber Personalities

Caliber Personalities – What does your caliber of choice say about you? Here is what a small group of polled shooting friends had to say about the personality they have based on a cartridge.

Enjoy, and remember, don’t take it too personally.

380

This caliber is like the kid on the JV team that pesters everyone that “I am better than those guys too” as he begs to be put into the game. While he may get the job done, most would consider his size and stature too small to be taken seriously in the playoff game. This round could also be the female softballer that could maybe kick your ass, maybe not, but you’d rather not find out. Either way, the real football players wouldn’t be caught dead hanging with him in public.

9mm

Like a decent running back, this little round does a good enough job on some plays to get a lot of time in the game but also has had enough issues where the coach is always thinking he should pull him. He has also been around for a few extra years and might be a 5^th year senior due to not being particularly remarkable, but it still goes on. He probably wears brand-name shirts of the type of gun he is touting or anything with an American flag and might have a slight German accent. This round screams, “I am just as good as (insert every other caliber) with the right ammo choice and shot placement.

45ACP

The football team’s linebacker is not fast and not particularly noteworthy, but to that poor sap that is in the wrong spot at the wrong time feels like getting hit with a freight train. He is not very bright, might wear cowboy boots, or have story’s that start with “back in my day.” Like the 9mm, he is varsity and likely a 5^th year senior as he is not innovative but remains effective. Probably a jeans-wearing guy with  button-down flannel shirt and a ball cap always opens doors and says “sir” and “ma’am.”

40 S&W

A newer kid on the block that recently moved into town was touted as the cure to the football team’s questionable winning streaks, specifically with lawman. He tends to be a bit snappier than the 9mm and more push than the 45. However, still not been drafted by many bigger military teams for a real game. He is the younger brother to the 10mm, who is off playing for an underground team that is touted for being brutal. This guy dresses in only 5.11 Tactical clothes and constantly talks about being the “grey man.”

10mm

People have heard legends of him being a punisher on the team, a real hot rod that dished out massive hits but also broke guns, and was never widely played due to fear, unfamiliarity, and high cost. He has seen a resurgence recently but is still oddball out of most conversations. It can be put in for many situations, but it is often overkill in all but the direst circumstances.

357/38SPL

The revered player with known performance but can be dialed down for games where the pressure is off, like during practice. Been around a while, likely a junior year player, drives a beat-up truck, boots, and cowboy hat. Usually put in as a special team’s event where his performance is really needed for a long-shot victory but is more found at home with a bunch of like-dressed individuals drinking beer or hunting.

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Author: Ian Bolser